Here we are the first day of not only just 2020 but also the new decade. While away earlier this week I strolled around a mall while my family skied (I can’t think of the last time I allowed myself to stroll in a mall with a Starbucks latte without feeling pressured to just get in and get out). It was two days after Christmas and the energy around me felt something like I was on the Busch Garden’s bumper car ride trying to get in and about without getting bumped. Those after Christmas sales were in full motion. No worries for me though, I’m not shopping, I’m simply sipping and strolling.
I noticed more than a bumper car energy. From stores like Anthropologie to Best Buy I saw items that had sayings about how to make 2020 awesome. Whoa! We were not even there yet and we are buying into the idea of future thinking. Now don’t get me wrong, I enjoy future thinking and strategizing, writing things out as a form of self-accountability, and planning my future hopes and dreams. However, I also absolutely love being in and celebrating the present. If we choose not to indulge in the now it will be gone in a blink. Grab it and pause.
This Is My Invitation To You To Pause For A Minute
I promise I’m not wanting to get in the way of you getting ready if you have super fun plans celebrating today. If your plans are like mine (which consists of wearing yoga pants, a comfy sweatshirt, sipping decaf peppermint tea and watching an episode of Modern Love which I’ve heard is very good) then please sip away and keep reading.
Let us not fall into bumper car mentality. If when walking around stores you see slogans of thinking forward and if your Facebook feed is also full of 2020 mantras, photos, etc. let us allow 2019 to be a beautiful moment, a decade to still have a voice. If there is one thing, I’ve learned the last year is not wishing the future here. It’s coming.
When you’re in your teens, twenties, thirties (and so on) sometimes we may dream what years coming up may look like. Parents I meet may share the mental picture of how they see their lives looking like once the kids leave for college. Stop and embrace how much they need you now (even when they tell you they do not).
To the men I meet who feel they cannot wait to retire and enjoy future days on the golf course I encourage you to keep seeing who you’re mentoring and the incredible mark you’re making in your company today. They also need you.
To the woman who may be exhausted running to the retirement center overseeing her parents care and is struggling with the idea of waiting for the day her parents tell her to take a day off. Shorten your time there and play the games, take photos, smile at them. That future day will come.
When YOU choose the mentality energy of your current life you get to experience all moments and how you want to experience your now! It is here. It hasn’t moved to tomorrow yet.
Be In The Present Moment
Since we know we cannot go back in time like in the movie “Back to the Future” the lesson is to be in the moment. I know it is hard. Over 17 years ago I had the pleasure of working with an incredibly bright individual who wanted nothing to do with this concept. The avoidance was because they never learned how to do it. They giggled as they brought a comic to session one day of a comic strip from the NY Times of two elderly gentleman laughing at being stuck in the past and overthinking the future in a way to avoid the present. Seeing his life in black and white helped this mentioned person practice the uncomfortable. They wanted to have a choice on how to be in their moments.
You still have this moment to celebrate 2019. Stop and reflect, write your moments down, say them out loud. If you didn’t or did not know to celebrate them before, let your self-experience them now.
Keep Reading For 4 Ways To Celebrate New Year’s Day As The Best Day Of 2019 (And Possibly The Decade)
2019 Is In The Rear View Mirror
I’m going to own it. I made mistakes in 2019. I had handfuls of “aha” moments that at times felt like they came hours, days, weeks too late. Yup, initially I was frustrated. After moments or days of exhaling I needed to re-frame and be grateful for the mistakes. You see, if I did not sit with it for a bit, I could have become an expert at those mistakes! Now sitting with them too long can also be unhealthy. Here’s the way I encourage people to think about mistakes to learn from in session: picture a colander like one you use for spaghetti and throw that mistake in it. Run the water over it. Keep the good stuff and let go of the rest (often things like quilt, shame, imperfection).
2019 just entered your rear view mirror. 2019 may have been a hard year for you. We cannot make it go away. I wish I could throw some pixie dust for you and make that happen. Since I cannot do that what I want is to support you doing in allowing yourself to keep moving forward with each minute that passes on that clock. 2019 will be in the rear view mirror. You may need to glance at it for a moment. Just a moment though.
We Get To Choose How We Want To Be
It may feel like often we don’t get to choose. We may not even know what this means. This statement alone may feel overwhelming. What if it wasn’t? Imagine instead it was invigorating and energizing! Want a suggestion to try? Research shows the first 15 minutes of your day sets the mood of your day. Wow, wow, wow. Take an inventory over the next week how your first 15 minutes are without changing a thing. Are you rushing to get 586 things done including getting kids up and out the door, loads of laundry done, answering work emails, yelling out to the dinner fairy what should be for dinner (if she answers please let me borrow her), all while being dressed for work and having your bag packed?
I’m exhausted for you and I have been you if you are currently living this way. Instead, try a new intention of changing your first 15 minutes. Whether that means you stay in bed listening to your favorite music or podcast, lay on the floor and do some stretching, write a journal post stating your intentions for the day please take your fifteen minutes instead of giving them away!
Lessons You Can Carry Forward
Life is full of lessons. Remember a few moments ago I shared some of those incredible lessons came from the aha moments of mistakes. Commit to yourself to carry them forward. You worked hard to learn them. They, and you deserve the moments to capsize on them.
Picture for a moment one of those “aha” moments. Yes, the before, during, and after. Here’s one thing I know. A similar situation may present again in the future. Rather than it simply grabbing you, think about it so that should it come again you will be familiar with it and how you want to respond to it. Thank-you for life lessons. Working through lessons provides us with choices.
Time To Be Excited, A Blank Canvas
Nothing can feel more refreshing than picturing a blank canvas. You get to choose what goes on it. Will it be new relationships? Returning to school or starting a new career? Plan in place to take charge of investing in your health. Some things you may remove from your canvas. Feel free to leave behind unhealthy boundaries. People pleasing tendencies. Yup, leave those behind. Over- extending yourself to avoid hard conversation? No thank-you, we no longer need to do this. Picture you new canvas and what YOU want on it.
Happy New Year! Need help catching those celebrations and keeping them present in 2020? Contact me at 239-848-2022 or click on “book it” at the top of the page to have the life you’re longing for and support committing to it.